AUTHOR
[...]
But I lie. There is nothing, then there is no Me . I define as what, if I believe in no(-)thing and no one? Clown.
(I) Make everyone to laught, but myself. I want to forget myself. All the mistakes. All "could"s. All those times...
Too afraid to do anything. No friends, Just being there. But my fault. I wanted ("no") help, - but "if you are friends with everyone, there is something wrong with you." Exquisite /sarcasm.
Heh, guilt-trip. By myself. What a gift. Prolly thing that keeps me still going on, even when I do (rather) nothing. *Faust*ing around? IDK TBH how to end this overthinking,this post even. Bye then, I guess, mleh. Feels bland; bad, maaan...
[...]
But I lie. There is nothing, then there is no Me . I define as what, if I believe in no(-)thing and no one? Clown.
(I) Make everyone to laught, but myself. I want to forget myself. All the mistakes. All "could"s. All those times...
Too afraid to do anything. No friends, Just being there. But my fault. I wanted ("no") help, - but "if you are friends with everyone, there is something wrong with you." Exquisite /sarcasm.
Heh, guilt-trip. By myself. What a gift. Prolly thing that keeps me still going on, even when I do (rather) nothing. *Faust*ing around? IDK TBH how to end this overthinking,this post even. Bye then, I guess, mleh. Feels bland; bad, maaan...
ABOUT · INTROS
Vitajte na mojom novom blogu.
Keď je človek najšťastnejší, začne sa všetko kaziť, priam zákonite.
Ak je všetko hotové, ukáže sa tá najmenšia chyba a musíte robiť všetko odznova.
Najlepšie na tom však je to načasovanie.
Nazvané aj ako hrozné načasovanie.
Človek nikdy nič úplne nedokončí. A vôbec, -
Ranné Depresso už zasa tečie na hlavu.
Studená sprcha v podobe miniatúrnej chyby, ktorá nebyť tak byrokratického
a striktného systému, vôbec nemusí existovať.
Človek sa nikomu nezavďačí.
Každý hľadá chyby a šanca na vlastné napravenie "brvna v oku"
prichádza vo chvíli vrcholu slávy.
A je to zábava - pre niekoho iného. Parádna haluz.
Priam toto milujem! Čím viac mám v paži, tým viac sa v skutočnosti starám.
Čím viac niekoho nenávidím, tým viac ho v skutočnosti obdivujem. A čím viac
plačem, vlastne dokazujem sám sebe,
že žijem a nie som len šialeným Božím experimentom.
Z najväčších chýb sa učíme, z najmenších skladáme dejiny.
[...]
Who
Just some n00b who was learn to attention-whore by long exposure to Net and Media. As One Andy said, ...Fame... (while it lasts). / Hates to Code, Does anyways. (LOL, as-if the HTML + CSS was Coding, anyways...) / - When 90% is done, I start to hate it...
Why
Why the Hell Not. I got bazilion Sites that I started to Hate near the end. I just make them ugly XD. Too complicated, too bloated, too long, too wild and unreadable, unwatchable, oof...
What
Web. The One you see, in front of you. Not much, but honest work. No JavaScript needed (yet). Been worse, this one is from the better. Just Plain and Simple. (Once, please, One single time; Be Good!)
Where
In front of you(r own eyes). And everyone else. See my other Sections for that. - Many done, many ugly, many too "much" of stuff to the brim...
Simplicity Approach (Art of Web1.5)
You see, I had many Pages before. And I just couldn't Help Myself But make them long, bloated, full, and to Call it, Painful to glance (your eyes) at. /
This one was inspired, therefore, by "The First Webpage". Ever; ever-ever. Back when (we were young /jk) Internet just came To Be - its humble Beginnings. So there is for That...
No-More Long-Bloat!
Simple and Clean (as in That Song, yeah...); and, Being cool (as in: No Pain) to look at. Let's stay at That. / No-nonsense!
Filozofia
duch, sloboda, človek, matéria, energia, bytie, dav, samota, písmo, svet, vesmír, stvorenie, všeličo; 90s-kid control education ego gate-keeping Harari-objectivist late 10s music opinions philosophy phonies playlists pokračovanie post-9/11 post-cap post-truth postmodernism pov; questions rant rants thoughts
II.ntro
Lain + Evangelion + Steins;Gate + Key metal idol + GIST + Alita...
*One wonders - do we create labels for ourselves and others - just so we
- we save time by this - are(nt) we...*
*And religions - are just simplifications of our urge to understand -
yet, to - shorten - our views, to make - connections - save time
too...*
#So this dude HAL9000, heuretical, is only what we are too - but we
have morals - lest lost, we are too, on alone, like HAL, him...#
Back in the days, it was "Going on web to escape reality.", then it
became "Going to reality to escape this net bs.".
//The question, now, is - what it should be, NOW? · If both those spaces
are corrupted, what stays - your imagination? Dreams?//
~~Predicting everything is fine - lying to yourself, others too? · They
do it too anyways, why dont you? It feels bad i know, - why dont THEY
feel bad, then!?...~~
- The thing is: DO YOU FEEL BAD BECAUSE YOU SHOULD,
OR BECAUSE YOU WERE LEARNT YOU SHOULD?!
Intro · Blog (archive)
Welcome(2).
This is my new webpage. I made it for my all links.
Why? Because why not. (Who I play with, I am so lonely...)
Well, it was my fault. Being such wet blanket, so indecisive , so "unrooted" to anything.
Not believing in anything (and anybody, huh) brings, with freedom, the sense of belonging - to nothing. No solid ground. Nothing. Just my self.
[author]
Vitajte na mojom novom blogu.
Keď je človek najšťastnejší, začne sa všetko kaziť, priam zákonite.
Ak je všetko hotové, ukáže sa tá najmenšia chyba a musíte robiť všetko odznova.
Najlepšie na tom však je to načasovanie.
Nazvané aj ako hrozné načasovanie.
Človek nikdy nič úplne nedokončí. A vôbec, -
Ranné Depresso už zasa tečie na hlavu.
Studená sprcha v podobe miniatúrnej chyby, ktorá nebyť tak byrokratického
a striktného systému, vôbec nemusí existovať.
Človek sa nikomu nezavďačí.
Každý hľadá chyby a šanca na vlastné napravenie "brvna v oku"
prichádza vo chvíli vrcholu slávy.
A je to zábava - pre niekoho iného. Parádna haluz.
Priam toto milujem! Čím viac mám v paži, tým viac sa v skutočnosti starám.
Čím viac niekoho nenávidím, tým viac ho v skutočnosti obdivujem. A čím viac
plačem, vlastne dokazujem sám sebe,
že žijem a nie som len šialeným Božím experimentom.
Z najväčších chýb sa učíme, z najmenších skladáme dejiny.
[...]
Who
Just some n00b who was learn to attention-whore by long exposure to Net and Media. As One Andy said, ...Fame... (while it lasts). / Hates to Code, Does anyways. (LOL, as-if the HTML + CSS was Coding, anyways...) / - When 90% is done, I start to hate it...
Why
Why the Hell Not. I got bazilion Sites that I started to Hate near the end. I just make them ugly XD. Too complicated, too bloated, too long, too wild and unreadable, unwatchable, oof...
What
Web. The One you see, in front of you. Not much, but honest work. No JavaScript needed (yet). Been worse, this one is from the better. Just Plain and Simple. (Once, please, One single time; Be Good!)
Where
In front of you(r own eyes). And everyone else. See my other Sections for that. - Many done, many ugly, many too "much" of stuff to the brim...
Simplicity Approach (Art of Web1.5)
You see, I had many Pages before. And I just couldn't Help Myself But make them long, bloated, full, and to Call it, Painful to glance (your eyes) at. /
This one was inspired, therefore, by "The First Webpage". Ever; ever-ever. Back when (we were young /jk) Internet just came To Be - its humble Beginnings. So there is for That...
No-More Long-Bloat!
Simple and Clean (as in That Song, yeah...); and, Being cool (as in: No Pain) to look at. Let's stay at That. / No-nonsense!
duch, sloboda, človek, matéria, energia, bytie, dav, samota, písmo, svet, vesmír, stvorenie, všeličo; 90s-kid control education ego gate-keeping Harari-objectivist late 10s music opinions philosophy phonies playlists pokračovanie post-9/11 post-cap post-truth postmodernism pov; questions rant rants thoughts
II.ntro
Lain + Evangelion + Steins;Gate + Key metal idol + GIST + Alita...
*One wonders - do we create labels for ourselves and others - just so we
- we save time by this - are(nt) we...*
*And religions - are just simplifications of our urge to understand -
yet, to - shorten - our views, to make - connections - save time
too...*
#So this dude HAL9000, heuretical, is only what we are too - but we
have morals - lest lost, we are too, on alone, like HAL, him...#
Back in the days, it was "Going on web to escape reality.", then it
became "Going to reality to escape this net bs.".
//The question, now, is - what it should be, NOW? · If both those spaces
are corrupted, what stays - your imagination? Dreams?//
~~Predicting everything is fine - lying to yourself, others too? · They
do it too anyways, why dont you? It feels bad i know, - why dont THEY
feel bad, then!?...~~
- The thing is: DO YOU FEEL BAD BECAUSE YOU SHOULD,
OR BECAUSE YOU WERE LEARNT YOU SHOULD?!
Intro · Blog (archive)
Welcome(2).
This is my new webpage. I made it for my all links.
Why? Because why not. (Who I play with, I am so lonely...)
Well, it was my fault. Being such wet blanket, so indecisive , so "unrooted" to anything.
Not believing in anything (and anybody, huh) brings, with freedom, the sense of belonging - to nothing. No solid ground. Nothing. Just my self.
[author]
PORTFOLIO
> Vizuál > sytev.sk/sk/Verejná zbierka „Šanca pre mladých“ (SYTEV)
> Vizuál > issuu.com/sytevoz/docs/ PRÁCA S DEŤMI A MLÁDEŽOU V KYS. N. MESTE Z POHĽADU MLADÝCH ĽUDÍ (SYTEV)
> Vytvorené mnou > instagram.com/sytev Svetový deň masmédií (SYTEV)
> Maturitná práca - web > budatinskyhrad.wz.sk/index.html
> Portfólio - plagáty > drive.google.com/drive/folders/...?usp=sharing (pre SYTEV)
> Web pre známeho > sites.google.com/view/padychj-osobnytrener/domov
>> My Portfolio(*)
> Vizuál > sytev.sk/sk/Verejná zbierka „Šanca pre mladých“ (SYTEV)
> Vizuál > issuu.com/sytevoz/docs/ PRÁCA S DEŤMI A MLÁDEŽOU V KYS. N. MESTE Z POHĽADU MLADÝCH ĽUDÍ (SYTEV)
> Vytvorené mnou > instagram.com/sytev Svetový deň masmédií (SYTEV)
> Maturitná práca - web > budatinskyhrad.wz.sk/index.html
> Portfólio - plagáty > drive.google.com/drive/folders/...?usp=sharing (pre SYTEV)
> Web pre známeho > sites.google.com/view/padychj-osobnytrener/domov
GALLERY (ARTISTIC SPURTS)
· · · · · | · | · | · | · | ·
· · · · · | · | · | · | · | ·
QUOTES, IDEAS, MOTTOS
Means - Different Content - Same (Lead...) Do it wrong, Not at all Or Do it right 10% - What you did 90% - W.Y.D. with this Situation... Question Everything... "there" Not "You", but your actions & reactions makes (you) "You" :/ - Not "You" (there) - just ~your~ reactions; No excuses, nor expectations... All your life, you collect people to/for your funeral; Also, you collect things to Define yourself with... ---Cicada 3301 Koan--- Loss ---Ccd--- :::You worry === You-Target::: ---There is nothing worse than to...--- Be (not) Afraid to do something and Then to Worry about Missed Opportunity :( )Happy to be Me, ig( NO mistakes, JUST "experimental phase" //If EveryBody [X], then would you (do it), too? NO MORE THINKING, THANKS! ~~~garden~~~ ***Shiawase no Monosashi*** [EN] /\always could be worse /s /\ · Nikdy (ešte) nebolo tak, ako ešte len bude ~Dont fear the Reaper~ /Look at me, What do You see, Am I real, Or Just a dream... ^Sissy Snowflake [BEAT ME TO IT!] /It s my Life; And You are, Pardon, NO(T) my art director, ~ NOR any of roles **main** --- sorry, Not sorry./ Ak máš v ruke kladivo, všetko začne vyzerať ako klinec. „Bože, daj mi pokoj, aby som prijal to, čo nemôžem zmeniť a daj mi odvahu zmeniť to, čo zmeniť môžem a mám a ešte mi daj múdrosť spoznať ten rozdiel.“ — František z Assisi „Najväčšia chyba, ktorú môžete v živote urobiť, je stále mať strach, že nejakú urobíte.“ — Elbert Hubbard
I LIKE... (tags!)
#CowboyBebop #MacPlus420ModernComp #Funk #Jazz #JazzFussion #"SoUnique" #CantBelieve-A-Thing* #WhatIsTruth #WhereIsTheEndOfThis #EvangelionSongsAreMajestic #"BornToFeelForcedTo(?)Fight" #PopularThingsDontAllSuck #MatterOfPrinciple #MatterOfPerspective #Mysticism #BodyAndSoul #MaybeSoulMusic #AmbiguousMusicGenres #WhoIAm #WhyAreWeThisWay #Can WeChange #TooSlowTooRandom #WhatYouWantVSWhatYouNeed #ChaoticMind #ComfortablePainKeepinMeAndYouFeelAlive #FormsChangesPrinciplesStays #WhyShouldIDoThisToMyself #WantToChangeButIDKWhatAndHow #ILoveYourHateTowardsMe #IHaveItIDontWantWantItAnymore #RapAndJazzAndTrapAndWeirdCoversMixes #NostalgiaForNeverBeenRealities #GenresChaos #WhatIsThisInMyHead #MemeticHazard #WeLiveInBoringFutures #WouldntItBeNice... #NetVSRealityVSSocietyImage(s) #LostMyselfInAllSarcasm #WhichOfTheseMe(s)IsTheOriginalIVeBeenBornWith? #NoRealityJustUI/UXObjects.con(s)c(epts):D*
#Personality #Me #Myself #MyDefinition #LostInLife #Blog #Rant #Aesthetics #Post2010s #NoJobNoXP #FormVSIdea #NatureVSComfort #MusicFan #"SoINFP" #LetsPretendIts60s #Post9/11 #DominoLineCasiopeaSong #NeverEndingWorldSeemsSo #MissThe90s (Hauntology) #OhBoyDontLetMeStart #Nostalgia #CityPopFan #21stCenturyBreakDown #JoinTheBlackParadeMCR #Teenagers #Kirinji時間がない #AhTheMonopolies #NGEFan #TooMuch(Good)SongsToLike #SELain #Akira #GITS #PerksOfBeingAnWallflower #EmmaByAusten #LoveWillTearUsApart #LoveIsDestructive #LoveIsAllWeNeed #
#CowboyBebop #MacPlus420ModernComp #Funk #Jazz #JazzFussion #"SoUnique" #CantBelieve-A-Thing* #WhatIsTruth #WhereIsTheEndOfThis #EvangelionSongsAreMajestic #"BornToFeelForcedTo(?)Fight" #PopularThingsDontAllSuck #MatterOfPrinciple #MatterOfPerspective #Mysticism #BodyAndSoul #MaybeSoulMusic #AmbiguousMusicGenres #WhoIAm #WhyAreWeThisWay #Can WeChange #TooSlowTooRandom #WhatYouWantVSWhatYouNeed #ChaoticMind #ComfortablePainKeepinMeAndYouFeelAlive #FormsChangesPrinciplesStays #WhyShouldIDoThisToMyself #WantToChangeButIDKWhatAndHow #ILoveYourHateTowardsMe #IHaveItIDontWantWantItAnymore #RapAndJazzAndTrapAndWeirdCoversMixes #NostalgiaForNeverBeenRealities #GenresChaos #WhatIsThisInMyHead #MemeticHazard #WeLiveInBoringFutures #WouldntItBeNice... #NetVSRealityVSSocietyImage(s) #LostMyselfInAllSarcasm #WhichOfTheseMe(s)IsTheOriginalIVeBeenBornWith? #NoRealityJustUI/UXObjects.con(s)c(epts):D*
#Personality #Me #Myself #MyDefinition #LostInLife #Blog #Rant #Aesthetics #Post2010s #NoJobNoXP #FormVSIdea #NatureVSComfort #MusicFan #"SoINFP" #LetsPretendIts60s #Post9/11 #DominoLineCasiopeaSong #NeverEndingWorldSeemsSo #MissThe90s (Hauntology) #OhBoyDontLetMeStart #Nostalgia #CityPopFan #21stCenturyBreakDown #JoinTheBlackParadeMCR #Teenagers #Kirinji時間がない #AhTheMonopolies #NGEFan #TooMuch(Good)SongsToLike #SELain #Akira #GITS #PerksOfBeingAnWallflower #EmmaByAusten #LoveWillTearUsApart #LoveIsDestructive #LoveIsAllWeNeed #
HighExpectationsEverywhere#4EverDreamer #Liberal #PostScarcity #ShiroSagisuFan #KenjiKawaiFan #OmegaTribe1986 #CasiopeaBand #Lamp(jp)Band #LeastAuthority #"SoEnnea4" #"SoAquarius" #MaybeNiceAnarchy #WebDesignIsDeadByTemplates #MissingOld... #RemembersWhen... #LastAnalogGen #BornIn99 #WannaHugz? #SocDemLib #IAmNotYourAverageBoy (i am worse) #BoringFutureWeLiveIn #SaveThePlanet #SaveSocietyFromItself #ForTheNextGen #NoPrivacyGotUsed(Not)ToIt #GenialMoron-MoronicGenius #Nihilism #OldWebs #AvrilL #RockClassics #SilentVoiceAnime #SteinsGateAnime #SomeAnimes #Synth #OldiesAccousticEccoJamsHouse #MintJamsCasiopea #SorryCountryAndDubstep #Pop #Indie #DanMason #Macross82-99 #LovesAllTones #JustFloatingThere #PunkEmo #Instrumental #CountWhatYouHaveNow #ShiawaseNoMonosashi #60sTo90sTo10sMusic #HateThoseMadeUpConcepts #ItsAllInYourHead /*Harari; aaah/ #FutureFunk #VaporWave #DanceHouseElectroOutrun #BelieveInYoungOnes #YouthRule;Dream #OutOfBoxByTooManyBoxes #TooLongForEndOfTheWorld #PostTruth #NoMediaCircuses #AllAreConcepts* #GoldenRule #TooMuchLiberalism? #MidLifeCrisisIn20s #QuarterLifeCrisisIn20s #SigmaButTooMuchFeelz #ItIsWhatYouWantItToBe #AreWeReal #Really...? #WhereIsTheLove #2004sOr2009sZeitgeistNostalgia #StuckIn2010s #NoBigBrother #MissVines #MildlyAnalogChildhood #NetAsNotIRLSubstitute #WhatIWentToSchoolFor? #ClasslessW/ORuler #AnalysisParalysis #Empath(y)Paralysis #TooMuh(many)Thoughts #EnjoyingMyIronicMysery
Rather things I hate: - being lost in the world - unable to decide - ill-liberal internet socialitē who have to walk between egg-shells to not offend anyone (yes I am that type who want to be walked on in between...) - impractical philosophy guy who is afraid of people, conflicts and non-sense politization - yet, all this I do... I like to tease, treatise, poke society in seams like that one dude in antic did (Diogenes, - or the other one??) - I hate those types^, cookie-cutter video essayists who say how capitalism, world, humanity, good morals nadanada are all over - yet I watch them, it seems, I like to be pissed off! You had true someone when you said, people make this to themselves, just to feel things, thrill... I won't admit it but Mark Mason "how to not DGAF " book got that right - since, brain is set to drama, danger, threat , not anymore present in our industrial society... - fear of any action being futile - nihilism - things, world making no sense , no impact - yet afraid of that impact - afraid of that... I can't never like anything, because I will succumb to its customs... I want change, but will hate it - add maybe this is why we long for golden days, that never were, - vaporwave... I don't want to get fucked over, by promises and this curse... Curse of nothing, anything being good enough for me (ah you, Mark/Fisher)... I will be on hook, and then the rest will be took away from me, like politicians tend to do... > Slovak proverb: better to know than to have.
TAKES (SORRY-NOTS)
you see, shootings too, get normalized if it is "daily bread". when things became norm, it is hard to see world as what it was before. we didnt have washing machines, microwaves, stoves. years before, there were only sheds and no running water or central heating... like that
my mother is "boomer" who denies her problems ("its all good, love light laugh" bascially) father is prankster who would love to live in woods XD, but - there was shit happening - situations for life
i might have as well. i dont know if it was just jokes, or attacks, at elementary. at high school, it was more of evryone on phone and having no things on common, so i was rather alone, because i felt entitled to them XD
undesirable? yes, it seems as shit if everything is for profit. then, you are burden, but what gives. i hate it when i cant get job, but its not my fault if you cant fight it in the first place. it is just fucked up and i will just wait til things go south, or until people at top will lose money/their positions to younger ones
i am dumb, idk what to do, i cant even decide what i want...
- i am anxious, question everything, am too dreamy and idealistic + romantic, moodswings over hi- and lo- expectations, no common ground with others (i made this weird, quirky and stupid façade of Self ...)
- i always, as kid, rather secluded myself from others, because idk, i maybe thought "i am interesting", "special", "too cool for others". and even if i wanted, i am nowadays undecided as fuck, know too many things and none of (those) i am specialist, - got no friends (had, but it was just bunch of kids on block
- i got no topic to say...)
-- went to no uni (undecided, hi expectations, my ideal of "forever 2007" died in 2013 (globalization to blame?)) - parents has it good, but it was so-so, as due communism - yet then, Americans say past was "just different", you just "walked in, shook hand, got job"...
*about hi-expectations - it was only that i could draw well and "remember" weird encyclopedia stuff [i am like, huh, dont every kid do that?] (it is hard to, but every kid draws, so it is messed up and that idea made me "aftergifted", of sorts - with no goal, just having surface knowledge and vocab on weird things)
Yes. I didn't participate much in anything, meaning I did the worst thing that I could - never truly fail. This has me spoiled; if you understand.
I am curious! To me it was scary because Shinji, MC, has to decide ; which is, for me, in my situation, that I never close any option, never decide... Nightmare, if you will. He, as me,was told what to do, and when he had to decide and do A thing in his life for himself, it is... As being betrayed.
yes
you know these 3AM thoughts?
so, kinda this... you got them, got the idea, but then, the first thought just stops you
- "if i do this, then everything else would have to be solved too", so you rather dont even start
also, when (related^) your mind tries to "lie", negotiate in the way *all bad things recap clip-show*
- you were learned into this way of thinking because of your experiences. you know this is *possibility*, yet, doing nothing is safer than doing anything maybe those eureka moments, enlightenments, only happen to people who hit the rock rock rock bottom; but idk, it is like, quite different level, kind, of "slap" - maybe it has to be related to more real world, to things that affect others
- that to "just mussing"... no idea here why is it (?) like that...
(redacted) i had it similar if not even worse it is so bad to "by accident" ("skill issue", teachers not seeing who is victim and abuser) more likely than not, punish victims. when they dont fight back, it is bad. when they do - it is bad, too. tired of this shit.
totally, if "normies" did something worse than i would (i sometimes act weird and cant quite answer it why, then, later, or never) - like, make stupid reply, yell, get mad... i am thinking if i got autism, mother said i was "tested" as kid, we "could know"... idk, heard stories of adults who just found out deep in 40s-50s... just lowkey scared i would lie myself into being autistic... or always was? no clue. like, if it is even possible to "lie" to those guys who do diagnosis (ever heard of Munchausen by proxy?) ~ idk the place, where or how those tests are done :/, i just want to know if i am just delusional, or if i was like this "from always"...
why is it not normalized(!) for those with disabilities to fight back!...
when normies act "goofypilled", it is romantized; when somebody does so of being "done with shit" (not mad; not mad *like that*), from trauma, from fighting back - it is *suddenly* something bad?(!)
/secretative data/ i thought, for difference, than me and few like-minded individuals/groups who were, as me, very low at that time (like 3 months or so, prior), attracted/made-to be covid "into" reality - talked about here in chat, learned about (chaos?) magick... would be interesting if that is doable, and even, rather be used for better things...
/from chat; these are my thoughts... opinions... i might be wrong; this is just how i see it... dont get offended and if, then - epiphany?huh?/ i cant blame you for this, but people in general dont like complaining much, i know it firsthand, i complained way too much, that it started to annoy people (what a goofy mistake)
also, dont ask people on >redditcostanzayeahrightsmirk, they hold themselves on "high" standard (self-proclaimed, self-entitled geniuses, autists (whatever that means "in their book"), know-it-alls...) also, no such discussion is possible in "religion" media - whatever becomes fad, popular and highly acclaimed, it loses all "magic" the time redditors (not all of them are bad, but in general, ~ every lie got some true and start somewhere (to be believable)) and fandoms (past 2013; things from here hits different) lose its niche status and becomes , mainly for "revival gems/all-time classics" - obsessions... (sorry if i cant explain this any better, or if i lie - this is just what i and maybe some other people think)
you are not going insane - it is just that... evangelion was "inaccesible", "lost" (wink wink) and with Netflix, "all hell broke loose" - normies *suddenly* re-discovered "gem" , - or so those *first-watchers*, call it so and hold that, to a high status (if you are curious, there are some (such) tropes on Evangelion at TVTropes.org) ... [my fav trope is Main/ItsPopularNowItSucks]
/will NOT explain further - just feel the feelz.../ i understand it is hard to do so with autism. or when you are me and cant hardly lie about anything. i feel like kid, but i got not that heart or balls to lie. it just feels *disgusting* to me, somewhat, it is weird. (could also be called naiive.)
it has to be hard to "make" reason when this is nothing that horrible to worry about. i would have no idea too, how to make lie (alternative story) on spot... people , and normies, has done worse things. murders get glorified too :/
/*same^*/ but this can also mean , "sign" (or you colud lie yourself into (i should prolly at times like that)) that you have to prove them wrong. - not thru words, but acts. working harder, doing art, trying to set habits, declutter - like that (i lie to myself now, but those things could work for others - i am too stubborn and *quirky* to change anything (and egoistic - something like Asuka, only that i am scaring of this coping mechanism of mine (or i got none such trait and lie to myself i have; again)))
/opinion; ^#3/ just see that IP as "religion", "fad" - or even! - always in positive light! different view is always hard, but for society to improve (not saying politics or economics now), it is very needed. - we seem, as Western society, to run away from problems, meaning - they get never solved and are just carried further and futher, until similar problems cluster, accumulate together - if this all even make some sense.
/rant; all from -my- chats.../
you see, shootings too, get normalized if it is "daily bread". when things became norm, it is hard to see world as what it was before. we didnt have washing machines, microwaves, stoves. years before, there were only sheds and no running water or central heating... like that
my mother is "boomer" who denies her problems ("its all good, love light laugh" bascially) father is prankster who would love to live in woods XD, but - there was shit happening - situations for life
i might have as well. i dont know if it was just jokes, or attacks, at elementary. at high school, it was more of evryone on phone and having no things on common, so i was rather alone, because i felt entitled to them XD
undesirable? yes, it seems as shit if everything is for profit. then, you are burden, but what gives. i hate it when i cant get job, but its not my fault if you cant fight it in the first place. it is just fucked up and i will just wait til things go south, or until people at top will lose money/their positions to younger ones
i am dumb, idk what to do, i cant even decide what i want...
- i am anxious, question everything, am too dreamy and idealistic + romantic, moodswings over hi- and lo- expectations, no common ground with others (i made this weird, quirky and stupid façade of Self ...)
- i always, as kid, rather secluded myself from others, because idk, i maybe thought "i am interesting", "special", "too cool for others". and even if i wanted, i am nowadays undecided as fuck, know too many things and none of (those) i am specialist, - got no friends (had, but it was just bunch of kids on block
- i got no topic to say...)
-- went to no uni (undecided, hi expectations, my ideal of "forever 2007" died in 2013 (globalization to blame?)) - parents has it good, but it was so-so, as due communism - yet then, Americans say past was "just different", you just "walked in, shook hand, got job"...
*about hi-expectations - it was only that i could draw well and "remember" weird encyclopedia stuff [i am like, huh, dont every kid do that?] (it is hard to, but every kid draws, so it is messed up and that idea made me "aftergifted", of sorts - with no goal, just having surface knowledge and vocab on weird things)
Yes. I didn't participate much in anything, meaning I did the worst thing that I could - never truly fail. This has me spoiled; if you understand.
I am curious! To me it was scary because Shinji, MC, has to decide ; which is, for me, in my situation, that I never close any option, never decide... Nightmare, if you will. He, as me,was told what to do, and when he had to decide and do A thing in his life for himself, it is... As being betrayed.
yes
you know these 3AM thoughts?
so, kinda this... you got them, got the idea, but then, the first thought just stops you
- "if i do this, then everything else would have to be solved too", so you rather dont even start
also, when (related^) your mind tries to "lie", negotiate in the way *all bad things recap clip-show*
- you were learned into this way of thinking because of your experiences. you know this is *possibility*, yet, doing nothing is safer than doing anything maybe those eureka moments, enlightenments, only happen to people who hit the rock rock rock bottom; but idk, it is like, quite different level, kind, of "slap" - maybe it has to be related to more real world, to things that affect others
- that to "just mussing"... no idea here why is it (?) like that...
(redacted) i had it similar if not even worse it is so bad to "by accident" ("skill issue", teachers not seeing who is victim and abuser) more likely than not, punish victims. when they dont fight back, it is bad. when they do - it is bad, too. tired of this shit.
totally, if "normies" did something worse than i would (i sometimes act weird and cant quite answer it why, then, later, or never) - like, make stupid reply, yell, get mad... i am thinking if i got autism, mother said i was "tested" as kid, we "could know"... idk, heard stories of adults who just found out deep in 40s-50s... just lowkey scared i would lie myself into being autistic... or always was? no clue. like, if it is even possible to "lie" to those guys who do diagnosis (ever heard of Munchausen by proxy?) ~ idk the place, where or how those tests are done :/, i just want to know if i am just delusional, or if i was like this "from always"...
why is it not normalized(!) for those with disabilities to fight back!...
when normies act "goofypilled", it is romantized; when somebody does so of being "done with shit" (not mad; not mad *like that*), from trauma, from fighting back - it is *suddenly* something bad?(!)
/secretative data/ i thought, for difference, than me and few like-minded individuals/groups who were, as me, very low at that time (like 3 months or so, prior), attracted/made-to be covid "into" reality - talked about here in chat, learned about (chaos?) magick... would be interesting if that is doable, and even, rather be used for better things...
/from chat; these are my thoughts... opinions... i might be wrong; this is just how i see it... dont get offended and if, then - epiphany?huh?/ i cant blame you for this, but people in general dont like complaining much, i know it firsthand, i complained way too much, that it started to annoy people (what a goofy mistake)
also, dont ask people on >redditcostanzayeahrightsmirk, they hold themselves on "high" standard (self-proclaimed, self-entitled geniuses, autists (whatever that means "in their book"), know-it-alls...) also, no such discussion is possible in "religion" media - whatever becomes fad, popular and highly acclaimed, it loses all "magic" the time redditors (not all of them are bad, but in general, ~ every lie got some true and start somewhere (to be believable)) and fandoms (past 2013; things from here hits different) lose its niche status and becomes , mainly for "revival gems/all-time classics" - obsessions... (sorry if i cant explain this any better, or if i lie - this is just what i and maybe some other people think)
you are not going insane - it is just that... evangelion was "inaccesible", "lost" (wink wink) and with Netflix, "all hell broke loose" - normies *suddenly* re-discovered "gem" , - or so those *first-watchers*, call it so and hold that, to a high status (if you are curious, there are some (such) tropes on Evangelion at TVTropes.org) ... [my fav trope is Main/ItsPopularNowItSucks]
/will NOT explain further - just feel the feelz.../ i understand it is hard to do so with autism. or when you are me and cant hardly lie about anything. i feel like kid, but i got not that heart or balls to lie. it just feels *disgusting* to me, somewhat, it is weird. (could also be called naiive.)
it has to be hard to "make" reason when this is nothing that horrible to worry about. i would have no idea too, how to make lie (alternative story) on spot... people , and normies, has done worse things. murders get glorified too :/
/*same^*/ but this can also mean , "sign" (or you colud lie yourself into (i should prolly at times like that)) that you have to prove them wrong. - not thru words, but acts. working harder, doing art, trying to set habits, declutter - like that (i lie to myself now, but those things could work for others - i am too stubborn and *quirky* to change anything (and egoistic - something like Asuka, only that i am scaring of this coping mechanism of mine (or i got none such trait and lie to myself i have; again)))
/opinion; ^#3/ just see that IP as "religion", "fad" - or even! - always in positive light! different view is always hard, but for society to improve (not saying politics or economics now), it is very needed. - we seem, as Western society, to run away from problems, meaning - they get never solved and are just carried further and futher, until similar problems cluster, accumulate together - if this all even make some sense.
/rant; all from -my- chats.../
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· ![repec.org | Research Papers in Economics is a collaborative effort of hundreds of volunteers in many countries to enhance the dissemination of research in economics. The heart of the project is a decentralized database of working papers, preprints, journal articles, and software components. The project started in 1997. Its precursor NetEc dates back to 1993. [wikipedia]](https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/blogger_img_proxy/AJ0KDdV89PFk7ErOj72NaPpaN5YZ_C3YShFP7yH0gxLDq-q-koRQPDjPobTrSIFrbyZ0zzH2ZdVQhmJDbu4zwEvaeKxe_A=s0-d)
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· oceanofpdf.com | niceee
· Use startpage.com · Use https://searx.github.io/searx/
> eve's awesome link list | (new!) *my friend was added in-here(?), so why not to share this with you!: it is very funny web that let you jump to random pages - and i wonder hiw this works XD (RisingThumb)*:
https://cloudhiker.net/ - Discover the most interesting, weird and awesome websites of the Internet | Cloudhiker is a collection of anything interesting, weird or astonishing; websites of exceptional quality, sites to kill time or learn something new. You won't find any clickbait Buzzfeed stuff or low-effort blog articles here. All sites on Cloudhiker are carefully reviewed and selected based on strict rules.; subsequently, then,: https://cloudhiker.net/explore |
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· · · · · oceanofpdf.com | niceee
· Use startpage.com · Use https://searx.github.io/searx/
> eve's awesome link list | (new!) *my friend was added in-here(?), so why not to share this with you!: it is very funny web that let you jump to random pages - and i wonder hiw this works XD (RisingThumb)*: https://cloudhiker.net/ - Discover the most interesting, weird and awesome websites of the Internet | Cloudhiker is a collection of anything interesting, weird or astonishing; websites of exceptional quality, sites to kill time or learn something new. You won't find any clickbait Buzzfeed stuff or low-effort blog articles here. All sites on Cloudhiker are carefully reviewed and selected based on strict rules.; subsequently, then,: https://cloudhiker.net/explore |
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